y’all, im real overwhelmed. I’m taking 9 hours of college classes this semester, on top of my normal highschool classes, plus 18+ hours of dance per wk, & at least 5 hours at church each, plus i have to sleep & stuff, and probably eat, and try & keep my social life, like i dont have time for life rn.
In my whole life i’ve only opened up to about 2 people. & both times it totally destroyed me & left me off way worse than before. I literally became things that I swore I’d never be & felt sadness that I didn’t know was possible. It wrecked me. it completely changed me as a person & in the matter of a year I went from having the joy of The Lord to completely being angry at Him & becoming such a bitter, angry, sad, & utterly heartbroken person. I’d hurt people to try & make myself feel better & I didn’t mind being hurt by other people because any new emotion was welcome. I had let my relationships with people define me. I believed that no one could possibly see value in me after really knowing me, because from my vantage point that was what had happened each time I let someone in. The Lord has really set me free from that this past summer, & He’s taught me that I am so valued & that no earthly relationship can bring me any joy or peace if I dont have Him. I dont have to unload my hurt on someone else, because the Lord has already taken the load off of my shoulders & I’m left with a testimony. A wonderful testimony to tell of His love and mercy. He is good.
yeah i cant get feelings for you.